To Read on the Journey

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Great Sorrow Becomes Great Joy!

This is me.  
10 yrs old.  
Chubby cheeks. 
Silly personality. 
I don't know who took this photo of me on my elementary school campus.
I don't know who gave me the cross necklace...
but I'm certain they hoped the cross would change my life (24).
When I was 10 "dad" 3 walked out of my life and "dad" 4 (of 7) galloped in on his non-white horse. 
I was wise enough to the ways of my world to know this "dad," who thought he was our "knight in shining armor," wasn't staying.
Though  I was a child I was no longer disillusioned by promises of forever.
I no longer believed a refuge home and a wealth of love would be mine.
Instead of hoping I waited for forever promises to be broken. 
Someone had to live in reality. 
I had to let go of their fairy-tales.

As I let go I concluded that I was not worthy of all the delightful things little girls truly hoped for...
to be someones beauty,
to be a father's treasure
to be wanted
to be loved


This 27yr old photo sits beside me with each post I type.
I look at it and hear the Redeemer say,
"I gave you the cross.  Abundant Life.  Forever.  Life in the wealth of My deep love for you.

I look at the 10yr old girl wearing the cross necklace,
and I whisper in her little girl ear, "God always had victory in mind for you."{25}

And my great sorrow becomes my great joy.(26)
You're Beautiful.
You are treasured
You are sacred
You are His.

Sharing 100 Joys with Sarah Marley.


deb said...

love you girl.

it is a joy sharing my heart with you,
knowing yours in mine

It's a Wannabe Decorator's Life said...

What a testimony! Thank you for sharing! You are loved!

Simply Sara said...


you are all these things.

love you friend.

Michele said...

I really like your new sweater. I purchased one for me this weekend and one for my MIL. Kathleen is just the neatest person with the some of the best WIWW outfits I've seen. I met her through WIWW and she's one of my favorite blog friends. The shirts you made for your girls are adorable! I love the joy list. I hadn't heard about that until your blog. Makes me think of the verse Nehemiah 8:10.

Jenn said...

Absolutely beautiful. God is in the business of redemption and I love that.

Alexis said...

I love this song, great addition to the post.