i am a promise!

if you have been following my blog than you have likely read my story.

i wouldn't say that i was raised in a Christian home. The lives my parent's and step-people lived were anything but godly.
When i went to live with my mother at the age of 6, she was married to my first step-dad, Kenny. Kenny loved Jesus. When he and my mom were together (between my ages of 4-7), she gave her life to Christ, was baptized, and we went to church. Sadly, life with Kenny wasn't all that perfect, they smoked pot regularly, and by the end of their short marriage each were dating a few different people. However, Kenny poured Jesus into us to the best of his 20yr old capabilities. He bought us bibles, shared bible stories with us, prayed with us, and just as important- loved us, played with us, and wanted more for us. He was the first man i called daddy. Calling him daddy came easily. Being wanted by a daddy came easily. When Kenny left, i was never the same.
i saw Kenny a few weeks ago. ironically he and my mother now attend the same church. He has definitely had struggles in his life, but in the very deepest part of him will always live a man who desires and loves Jesus. i am thankful to that man, and to the seeds God planted through him.
During the "Kenny years" my sister and i received a record The Bill Gaither Trio's Just for Kid.
We would play the record over and over on my little blue record player. We'd sing along with Bill and Gloria, neither of us knowing all the truth that was being tucked into our hearts.
Today i found and played those songs again (on cassette). i sang loudly and with enthusiasm just like that 7 yr old girl. i remembered all the lyrics. i cried, as i soaked up every word, thankful for the shaping of a little girl's heart. Thankful that even as life unraveled around me, God rejoiced over me with singing.
Deuteronomy 29:29 says, "The truth that has been revealed to you will not be taken from you or your children's children." i count on this verse as i raise my own children. Hearing these songs i see the fruit of it in my own life.

Here are the lyrics to one of my favorite songs on the record-
i am a promise
i am a possibility
i am a promise with a capital "P "
i am a great big bundle of potentiality
and i am learning to hear God's voice
and i am trying to make the right choices
i'm a promise to be anything He wants me to be

Other favorites on the record include-
Jesus i Heard You Had a Big House
Kid's Under Construction
Let All the Little Children Praise the Lord