under the circumstances

i recall hearing a story with a punch line once (which i'm now going to butcher trying to retell it) where a student tells his professor he didn't turn in an important paper because of this, that, and the other (see, totally butchering it). the student goes on to tell the professor that he couldn't finish the assignment "under the circumstances." (here's the punch line) the professor responds by saying, "well what are you doing under there?"

i told you i'd butcher it.

but did you get the point?  we shouldn't be under our circumstances.  we should be above them.

lately, i have been under my circumstances.

a number of trials have presented them self in this last year.

i hurt my back in august (when michael broke his hip and arm). i attempted to live in denial about it for as long as i could, but now sciatica is causing numbness in my left leg and arm. ergghh.

finances are a concern (we're still paying last years medical expenses, and new medical expenses are accruing).

a relationship with a family member is... ughhh. 

our van is sick, we may need to replace it.

finally, we feel that God has prompted us to leave our church (i've been there 17 yrs, michael 24 yrs). we don't know if this change is temporary or permanent.  we love our church family, deeply.  however, we see God moving in us and our children as a result of our obedience.

these circumstances are nothing new under the Son, but i have not been handling them well.

i want to handle these trials like James-

" Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."

i confess that i have been living like an atheist, not believing God.

however, here is what i KNOW:
God ALWAYS works these trials out for good.
God ALWAYS grows my faith, and draws me closer to Him as a result of the trials.
when i get out from "under the circumstances," and trust my Father, He shows Himself as
Maker, Provider, Lover, Healer, Redeemer, and best of all SURPRISER!

EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.

so i'm crawling out from "under the circumstance," and abiding in the Son. i'm giving up worry and choosing to worship.  I'm considering these trials joy, because my faith is going to increase, and He is going to be glorified through me.