And I can't afford it, but it's mine (savoring)

Last fall I wrote And I can't afford it, but it's mine.

In it I expressed that these lyrics had caused me to replace worry and comparison with the question what is mine that I can't afford?   

The answer too much.   

I've been thinking that documenting my 

"And I can't afford it, but it's mine" 

moments should be a regular occurrence here at Victory Rd., 

because these are moments I want to fix in my mind.

Michael reaches over, kisses me, tells me again "I'm so glad that you're my wife."

And this miracle of a marriage- I can't afford it, but it's mine.   

Noah reaches over and strokes the back of my neck as I drive.  He gives me the look.  It's been a while.  A long teenager while.  I savor it.

And being cherished by my son- I can't afford it, but it's mine.

I've got 2 hours to get dinner made and the house tidied before our "small groupies" arrive.  Josie joins me in the kitchen to make cookies for my guests.  She bakes in a sing-song voice, floating around the kitchen as she preps.

And the way she refreshes me with her joy- I can't afford it, but it's mine.

After dinner we celebrate the birthday of a small groupie by speaking words of blessing to Megan. I watch her face as truth and delight is spoken.  My heart filled with gladness as I watched her hear and embrace who she is.  The Spirit revealed to me how the Lord is OVERJOYED when we embrace His blessing spoken to us. 

And living blessed- I can't afford it, but it's mine.   

Receiving sweet texts from Emilie while she was away over the weekend for a school activity. She invites me into the details of her life through texting.

And her friendship- I can't afford it, but it's mine. 

We discover a bill that should have been wrapped into our mortgage has not been paid for.  We owe a good bit.  But I don't freak out!  I recall what I've learned- "nothing has permission to take my God-given security from me."

And this peace- I can't afford it, but it's mine.  

Coffee with a friend.  We share our painful, fragile, never should have been.  It's messy but safe because we share the same merciful God.  And He fills the questions and the ache with Himself through each other.  He makes beauty from our ashes.
 
And God- I can't afford Him, but He is mine!

 

Tell me, 

What are your

"And I can't afford it, but it's mine" 

moments from this week? 

 Live in Peace,