To Read on the Journey

Saturday, August 15, 2009

afflictions eclipsed by glory

when i fall in love with a new song it is common for me to marinade myself in it for a week, listening to it again and again, absorbing every part of it. i soak up the instruments, and how they crescendo and decrescendo. i rise and fall with them. i drink in the tone in the artists voice; the tenderness, power, longing, struggle, desire, passion, and message behind each word they sing. as i think over the lyrics i wonder at the writers own story, what beautiful mercy or grace lead them to write such powerful lyrics? and what did that moment of inspiration look like? that moment when the lyrics hit the writer's heart, the moment the pen hit the paper, and the pick strummed the strings on the guitar.
When i fall in love with a song, i become a part of the song. i am grateful that music so beautifully formulates the words and emotions i can not. i am grateful for the many songs that have spoken, healed, rescued, and spoken Truth to me.

last week i was marinading on the song He Love Us.

somewhere around 2:00 a.m. monday a.m. i left the emergency room, and drove the 45 min. home for a little rest. i got in my car and allowed myself to release the emotions i was bravely trying to hold back, but after just a few moments of release the lyrics of He loves Us sweetly covered my thoughts, not allowing me to become overwhelmed with all that had transpired that evening, but drawing me towards resting in the Truth of God's love for me, for michael, and for our family.

As God sang this song over me on the way home I was reminded that earlier that week i had asked Him, "what do the lyrics 'i am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory' mean?'"
and it occurred to me that through the events of the evening God was revealing to me the answer. here we were again in the middle of afflictions, but i was not consumed by the weight of them. i knew (and KNOW) that God is going to use this for His glory. He always does.
And i know that God is going to use this to draw us deeper into relationship with Him, deeper into His love. He is going to lavish His love on us. He always does.
these "afflictions are eclipsed by glory."

Hmmmmm.

And yes, we have been through many "afflictions" in our 13 yrs of marriage; a premature baby, followed by hemorrhaging and hospitalization, the loss of a son, debt, depression, hysterectomy, and other medical issues (to name just a few). BUT as i look back God has ALWAYS been glorified through each affliction, He has ALWAYS drawn us deeper into relationship with Him, deeper into the fullness of His love. And I am grateful for the ways He Loves Us.

Oswald Chambers says
, "when we are in fear we can do nothing less than pray to God, but Our Lord has right to expect that those who name His Name should have an understanding confidence in Him. God expects His children to be so confident in Him that in any crisis they are the reliable ones....There are stages in life when there are no storms, no crisis, when we do our human best; it is when crisis arises that we instantly reveal upon whom we rely. If we have been learning to worship God and to trust Him, the crisis will reveal that we will go to the breaking point and not break in our confidence in Him."

May we all live in His love, and may our confidence be in Him.

4 comments:

Kristen said...

so true. we can't see it when we are in it but when get through on the other side THEN we see the goodness and God's hand in it.

Love you and I know you will all come through this time stronger than ever!

Anonymous said...

Amen!!! Denise, though we spend very little time together, we are connected and likeminded through the love and grace of God. I love you and am very proud of you...Via con Dios...I am praying for you!!!

Laurie

Heart2Heart said...

It often takes something of a challenge for us in our life, to see the blessings that follow it.

I am just so glad that the difficult times don't last forever, and that God is with us every step of the way.

Love and Hugs ~ Kat

shannon said...

denise...
i have come to your blog through lindsey's blog! i have been a blog reader of hers for quite some time now, and have even purchased a few things from her. anyways...i am sorry to hear of your husband's accident and pray that he be strengthened, that your whole family be strengthened! i look forward to "getting to know you" through your blog as it seems very inspirational and encouragine!
i am also drawn and curious in something else you have mentioned...i am a stranger and so i understand if you don't want to respond, but i am struggling with something and after i read your last entry, i thought, well, maybe God allowed me to "meet" you for such encouragement as this.
i am a mother of two babies...emma is 4 and aidan is 2 1/2. i learned before i had both of my children that i had an anomaly with my uterus. i was told that i would be allowed several miscarriages before intervention. i found a second opinion...and yet diagnosed with another anomaly of the uterus. i had my two babies under that doctor's care....i was on bed rest for the last 10 weeks of my first pregnancy...(both babies were via csection)..and after my aidan was born, i hemorrhaged that night and came VERY CLOSE to not surviving it. it was the scariest moment of my life. thank the Lord, i was not done here. my doctor quit to stay at home with her children....so i was left to find another doctor. after not having a peace with the one that i found, i searched yet one more time...and found my current doctor. he and his daughter ( in practice together) have diagnosed me yet again, with an anomaly of the uterus...and i believe after much testing to be the correct diagnosis. i have a septate uterus, rather large fibroids among other issues. they have done a CT SCAN last week to see how involved my kidneys and colon are before doing a hysterectomy. i am EXTREMELY nervous of hemorrhaging again as my chances are higher. i am searching for encouragement and peace in this matter. i don't know too many people who have gone through this, and long story short, if you were willing to share....do you have anything encouraging for me? i know i am going out on a limb, and please forgive me if i am treading personal boundaries...forgive me. i am really scared and trying my best to trust Jesus...but i am human and i want to do the right thing...what is best for me and my family.
thank you so much for listening...if you made it this far in my comment...!
anyways...if i don't hear from you, i still look forward to reading what the Lord puts on your heart and hope to be encouraged and inspired by your writings!
sincerely...
shannon stinson